I want to dive in, to delve within
to get my hands dirty and dig them deep.
I long to journey to deeper realms
where darkness awaits with shimmering hope.
I yearn to soar, to let my spirit fly
and spiral higher into myself.
I long for all this and yet I sit
trapped inside a cage of my own design.
And I watch others make these journeys
And I smile and I weep and I scream and I rage
And I want to throw aside this cage.
And my soul aches, a physical presence in my mortal body
daily a reminder of where I want to be,
and I promise myself just a little longer, you're almost done.
But I wonder, will it still be there waiting for me?
The fear resides inside my head.
With each call made to me, each little moment of magic
I say not just yet and my soul cries,
and I fear I see that path close over just a little more.
And I want to scream, wait for me!
And I fight the urge to run off and follow the spark.
Instead I sit and I work and I study,
And I try to drown out the little voice inside my head
feeding it platitudes of eventually.
Copyright Julie Grucza 2012-2013